There’s tons of advice for American Expats in London available on the Internet, so I’m jumping straight to the quirky stuff, Sunny friends. You’re about to hear the scoop like you’ve never heard it before…
ADVICE #1- Get Ready to See Ta-Ta’s and Who-ha’s
Have any of you been to a gym yet? Holy nakedness, Batman! If you haven’t been to a fitness center in London, brace yourselves for the X-rated Locker Room SHOW! I damn near bump in to the walls and trip over the benches every time I walk in to my local LA Fitness Ladies’ Locker Room because my eyes are nearly cinched close. The amount of bare naked ladies parading around the room is a bit jolting to this American girl, and I grew up in Daytona Beach where we practically wore our bathing suits to school! Check out this photo I snapped in the locker room…
Yeah, right! Aside from all the pub crawls and champagne I write about, I’m keeping Sunny in London fairly G-rated. No nudey shots here!
But, big props to the body confidence European ladies have. However, I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to the amount of flesh skipping around that room.
ADVICE #2- The MAILMAN is not breaking in to your flat.
I have a mild heart attack every time my mail is delivered when I’m at home. In Florida, if someone comes up to your door step and starts messing about, you go in to lockdown mode and call 911. Therefore, when I hear the Royal Post Person shoving mail through that slot in my door, I always think I’m about to experience a home invasion.
ADVICE #3- Look both ways before you cross the street. TWICE.
It’s going to take a LONG, LONG time to figure out the roads. I’ve lived in London a few times, but I still can’t figure out where in tarnation cars are coming from. So, yeah, don’t even think about getting a driver’s license. It’ll be a year before you can cross a street and not be in sheer terror, much less operate a manual vehicle from the “other side.” Until then, stick with the good ol’ zebra crossings. Here’s me crossing Abbey Road, circa 199….
ADVICE #4- Order a drink and food right, or do the barmaid’s job.
“Can I get a Pinot Noir?” Every time I say that, Mr. Sunny cringes. Notice that when Londoners are ordering, they say, “May I have a London Pride, please?” There’s no “get”, and the request ends with “please”. As easy as it sounds, it’s an unnerving habit that us American foreigners need to break. When we say “get”, Londoners think “Sure you can. Get up and go GET it yourself, Yankee.” Sheesh.
ADVICE #5- The Rear of the Year sits at the bottom of the list.
Most of us Americans discovered Pippa the day of the Royal Marriage. If you’re a celeb siting stalker like me, from that day forward you forgot Kim Kardashian and fixated on a new arse crush to motivate your workouts.
Heck, I even rushed out and bought her book, “Celebrate.”
The truth is, British people don’t favour her too much. So, my advice is to keep your American infatuation with her to yourself. Better yet, ring me up, and we can spend 8-10 hours at a place she frequents in the odd chance she’ll show up and want to friend us.
ADVICE FOR AMERICAN EXPATS IN LONDON FINAL THOUGHTS:
Dickens wrote in Tale of Two Cities, “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times…”
Living in London can be both super fun and super challenging for expats. We miss the culture from our other city, but we love British culture too.
That’s my two pence worth of quirky advice for American Expats in London. I hope it helps you have the best of times. Please put your advice in the comment section below, Sunny friends. I’d love it if you shared this post somewhere.